she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
