i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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