this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
