Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
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