my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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