You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
