tell your sister to shave her snatch
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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