He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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