Me. At least after what I've been through.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Randomize