before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
