...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
