no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Hippo gnu deer
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
