How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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