so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
