So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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