Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize