all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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