So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
