I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
