ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
