yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
