so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize