I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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