STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
