Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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