There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
