we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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