the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
It's shark week go big or go home
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
