i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize