ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
