Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
you made out with another girl for some wings
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
