just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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