Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
