There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
