I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize