Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
