The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
