Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
