Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize