Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
