hotel room ftw
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
