Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
