Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
