Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Four minutes until I can fart!
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
