I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
