somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
