I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
