Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
