Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
