Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize